Hell Lightning - moja forumska serija

Čini mi se da ovamo upadam s tipom literarnog (ne)djela kakvog još nije bilo na ovom forumu.

"Hell Lightning" (Pakleni Bljesak) moja je forumska serija od 40 epizoda, od kojih svaka sadrži 3 do 5 stranica teksta u Microsoft Wordu. Kada se sagleda svih 40 epizoda skupa, moglo bi se reći da je ovo superherojska serija, čiji se glavni junak, poznat pod pseudonimom Hell Lightning, razlikuje od standardnih superheroja poput Supermana, Batmana i sličnih, svojim temperamentom koji ga kao lika stavlja na granicu između superheroja i antiheroja. Ipak, svaki njegov pothvat završi nečim dobrim.

Glavni lik ove serije je Dane Herrill, 25godišnji muškarac iz fiktivnog kalifornijskog grada Hellocityja, neobičan i prilično nedruštven čovjek, neshvaćen i usamljen, ali sretan u svojoj samoći, nesvakidašnjih zanimacija i preferencija u životu. Ističe se svojom samodovoljnošću, divljenjem svemu što sam napravi i neugodnim temperamentom. Daneov neobičan život jednoga se dana iz temelja mijenja kada on u travi pronađe tri neobična predmeta koja mu daju natprirodne moći, od kojih je najpoznatija njegova razorna munja crne boje, po kojoj je samome sebi izmislio pseudonim Hell Lightning.

Moj amaterski dizajn glavnog lika:


Ova forumska serija prvenstveno je napisana za strane forume, stoga je pisana na engleskom jeziku. Kasnije sam istu seriju prevođenjem na hrvatski jezik i "ušminkavanjem" do književnoumjetničkog stila pretvorio u roman koji je još uvijek u fazi obrade.

Dakle, ovo je ukratko o mojoj seriji. Engleska verzija dostupna je javnosti. Ukoliko ovdje postoji itko zainteresiran za čitanje ove serije, objavljivat ću englesku verziju u ovoj temi ;)

Hoćeš objavljivati? :)
Sorry, nisam prije vidjela..

Ova tema je postojala? 0.o

wow, netko je ipak ovo primijetio i javio se hvala vam, dame, evo prve epizode:

Episode 1 – Don't mess with the Hell Lightning:

At 2:00 PM, after finishing his hard work in the post office, Dane Herrill walked home. He was daydreaming about punching the face of his supervisor Kevin Davidson. During the walk, Dane's evil daydreams were interrupted by something shiny in the grass. As he squatted down, Dane noticed it was a silver medallion.

„So, someone lost a valuable silver item!“ Dane smirked. „Interesting, very interesting! I could sell this little thing for a nice amount of money!“

As he got up, holding the medallion, he immediately got terrible headache and a vision of scary black lightnings flashed in his mind. He screamed of the sudden pain in his head. At that moment, he noticed a pen and glasses in the grass, right next to the place where he found the medallion. Dane heard a mysterious voice in his mind saying „TAKE IT!“. As he got down again to take the glasses and the pen, he saw the reflection of his eyes in those glasses. The reflection was incredibly clear, but the eyes were mysteriously soaked with blood. Surprised by what he saw, Dane picked the glasses and the pen up. The terrible headache stopped. After letting a deep sigh of relief, Dane continued his walk home.

When he finally came back to his messy house where he's been living alone since his 22nd birthday 3 years ago, Dane sat down on his sofa and took his new items out of his pocket. He was so curious about the medallion, the pen and the glasses, and about the scary vision that he had. He heard a mysterious voice again:“PUT IT ON!“

„What the...?!“ he said. „Who are you?!“
„PUT IT ON!“ the voice repeated. „ON... ON... ON...“

Very surprised now, Dane put the medallion around his neck. He looked at the glasses and in them he saw his eyes soaked with blood again. As he took the glasses, the eyes smirked. Dane put them on. All what he saw through the glasses seemed to be a bit red. He was shocked, because he could swear the glasses were colorless. He took them off and looked at them. They really were colorless. He put them back on, and his sight became red again, as if he wore red sunglasses. With the medallion and the glasses on, he took the pen. At first nothing happened.

„What the hell is this thing?!“ he said. „This is just an ordinary pen!“

The pen suddenly turned itself around in Dane's hand and flew into the medallion, thus pressing a tiny button that Dane didn't notice at first. As the pen got back into Dane's hand, everything around him became glowy red. Dane stared in shock. The pen turned into a long black stick shaped like a lightning. The medallion hanging down from his neck became red with a black lightning sign. The shape of his glasses was also different. The frame became wider and harder. The red glow around Dane suddenly disappeared, and everything was normal. But the pen wasn't there. Instead of it, Dane was holding a black lightning-shaped stick. The medallion was still red with black lightning sign. But Dane wondered what did the transformed glasses look like. As he took the glasses off, two glowy rays blasted out of Dane's eyes right through the closed window. The window was broken in many pieces.

„Bloody hell!“ Dane said. „What was this supposed to be?!“

Dane looked at the glasses. They were totally different now. The frame was made out of shiny grey iron. One glass was strongly blue, and the other one was red. Dane put the glasses back on. The sight wasn't red and blue. It was slightly red, just like before the red glow around and transformation of the three mysterious items. Dane stared confusedly at the lightning-shaped stick in his right hand. As the wind blew through the broken window, Dane felt an enormous power in his right hand, as if the stick was making him more powerful. He spreaded his arm out through the window. Suddenly a glowing ray from the sky fell into the lightning-shaped stick. A black ray surrounded by red shine blasted out of the stick. It looked just like a lightning. The mysterious black lightning struck a street lamp which exploded immediately.

„Wow!“ Dane said. „That lightning looked like it came from the bloody hell! Haha! The Hell Lightning!!“ At first Dane wanted to go out, but in the next second he stopped. He didn't want anyone to see him with those mysterious items. He didn't want anyone to know that Dane Herrill was the one who owned three mysterious powerful items. So he went to a room where he kept all his nice memories from his childhood. He opened a wardrobe which was full of dark Halloween costumes.

„Yeah, wonderful Halloween parties!“ he thought. „My costumes were always the best ones! Of course, Dane Herrill must be the best one in everything!“

He took out a black mask that he wore on a Halloween party at the age of 17. It was a mask that can cover his forehead and the area around his eyes. Before putting the mask on, Dane went to take his glasses off, but then he remembered his broken window. So he opened the window of that room and took the glassess off. The mysterious rays blasted out of his eyes again. They went far away into the sky. It seemed like nothing was destroyed this time.

„Oh bloody hell, the rays appear whenever I take the glassess off!“ he said. In that moment, a powerful black lightning appeared in the sky. A strong and loud thunder was heard. It was clear to Dane, that lightning was produced by the rays from his eyes striking the sky. Now Dane put his black mask on his face, and he put the glasses back on. He walked back to the wardrobe. He took out a long black cape with red lining inside. It had a shorter capelet over the shoulders down to the waist, and a big hood. Dane remembered the day when he played a vampire in that cape. At that time, the cape was a bit too long for him. Now Dane put the cape on. It wasn't too long anymore, the length was just right. Dane looked at his reflection in the mirror.

„Wow, this looks totally great!“ he said. „No one could say that this man is Dane Herrill! Hahaha! Now I can go out!“

Dressed all in black, and with his medallion and glasses on, and the lightning-shaped stick in his hand, Dane walked to the door of his house. Before he walked out, he put black leather gloves on. As he closed the door, the fresh air felt more powerful than ever. Dane felt that all the energy on Earth belonged to him. He just felt that he could do anything he wanted. What a powerful and magical feeling!

He was walking down the street. People were staring at him. Some of them felt frightened and stepped back. Dane would smirk whenever he would feel someone's fear. Other people just walked aside, pretending not to notice him. Dane ignored those ones too. Suddenly, a man just a bit younger than him approached.

„What's up, buddy?“ he said. „Where is the Halloween party in the middle of the spring? HAHAHA!!“
„Back off, idiot!“ Dane growled and walked on. As his cape fluttered on the wind, the man grabbed the bottom of it and pulled it. As Dane felt his movement interrupted by the man who teased him a few seconds ago, he turned back, very mad. He thought what to do? To summon a black lightning and rip the man apart? No, he rather wanted to make him feel pain. He walked back to him and punched his face, imagining his supervisor that he hated so much.

„Ouch, you!!“ the man said. „This hurts!“

Dane turned around and walked on with a smirk on his face. The man behind took his mobile phone out to take a photo of Dane. As he did it, Dane felt the electric energy of the mobile phone in his body. He just knew that the man took a photo of him, but he didn't mind.

„Hello, police?“ the man said. Dane turned around. As he saw the man talking to the police via mobile phone, he lifted up his glasses and two powerful rays blasted out of his eyes and struck the mobile phone. The phone exploded in the man's hand. His hand was burned and bleeding. Dane walked back to him.

„I hope this was the last stupid thing you did with me, boy!“ Dane said. „If you go to the police, you won't survive the next meeting with me! I've warned you! Don't mess with me!“
„Who... are you?!“ the man asked, very frightened.
„I am... My name is the Hell Lightning!“ Dane said.
„The hell what?!“
„The hell will be in your head if you get close to me ever again!“

Dane lifted up his lightning-shaped stick and looked at the sky. A black lightning blasted out of the stick and hit the clouds. Dane's body together with the stick turned into red light which got sucked into a cloud. The cloud flew faster around the sky. A loud evil laughter was heard. Frightened people thought it was a ghost laughing...

(To be continued)

ako bude pozitivnih komentara i interesa za nastavak, bit će još epizoda ;)